What a terrible cross to bear.. ;D
Dear Holli,
Thanks for taking great pains not to be harsh. Civility is so underrated.
I didn't take any ill will by your post, so all is good! I will try to answer your question, but only can speak for myself.
Many believe, and it may be true, the the movement to find ones "roots" was fueled by Alex Haley's novel of the same name. I don't know if that's true, but it's certainly possible.
Firstly, I love history. When you do Family history, you actually get to do something you are personally involved in , and it's far more interesting.
Secondly, I have a STRONG feeling of family. Even as a teenager, when my friends wanted to go out and do stuff, if I there was a family gathering, that's where I wanted to be. By doing research, I have found MANY relatives I didn't know, but knew existed somewhere. I've met them in Poland, and spoke to them in Arizona, Michigan, and will meet a bunch of them this summer. For me, this is the lottery!
We have a saying here: you don't know where you are going, till you know where you've been. I'm not sure if that's totally correct, but historical perspective I think is important.
America is a huge melting pot whether you choose to recognize it or not: for those willing to be melted. Unless you grew up speaking Sioux, Apache, Navajo, or any other Native American tongue, you KNOW you are the son or daughter of an immigrant. I don't think that is in the European Psyche. If you dipped the spoon into the pot, and poured the contents into the bowl, what part did your ancestors contribute? Is it identifiable? How do you fit in? I wore it as a badge of honor in Kindergarten (German word) that my grandmother was born in outside the USA. I was pissed when I found out that the parents of a classmate were born outside the USA. I got "one upped"!
I know many people who were born outside the USA, who live here and have children here. They for the most part like the life, have complaints about the country. They maintain strong emotional bonds to their native country, but are respectful of America. Their children are 100% American, whether they speak their parents native tongue or not. Of course, their parents have not tried to convince them to do otherwise, they just let them grow up in their birth land, like my grandmother did to her daughter, my mom.
Why do we search, because the knowledge answers questions the sons and daughters of immigrants have in the back of their minds. What happened to get me here, what did my ancestors contribute to this country, and so forth.
Do not make the mistake of believing that somehow we feel like we're not truly American because we look. It's really ironic: the world thinks were this self centered country (jaga's poll) that cares nothing for what's outside it's borders, yet when we do look outside our borders, it's interpreted as discontent with who we are. The world wants us to "join the rest of the world", yet when we undertake a course that actually gives us an emotional connection to the rest of the world, somehow it's viewed as a lack of character, or wanting. I tell the world, " when you look at America, it's like looking in the mirror": if you don't like what you see, you're looking at yourself! (at least, collective self)
Well, that's a lessen learned while crowning up in America: not matter what you do, you will be despised for it! It, along with so much more, shapes who we are.
When do you "feel like an American", I couldn't tell you since I feel that way every day. I literally fly two flags at my home over the weekend, (much to the amusement of my neighbors), but if push came to shove, I know what uniform I'd be wearing. Perhaps only when someone goes on a blah blah blah diatribe against America, and you feel violated, then you're there.
I hope this helps in some small way.
It's ironic, our black populations for the most part do not want to be melted into our culture, they insist on being considered apart: thus their behavior every time the lights go out. As I said before, America embraces those who assimilate, and despises those who take with one hand, and bitching with their mouths because it's not enough! We're imperfect here, but so is the rest of the world.