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Post by justjohn on Jun 14, 2008 7:33:52 GMT -7
   First-year students at Texas A&M's Vet school were attending their first anatomy class, with a real dead cow. They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet. The professor started the class by telling them, "In Veterinary Medicine it is necessary to have two important qualities as a doctor: The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the animal body". For an example, the Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the dead cow, withdrew it and stuck his finger in his mouth. "Go ahead and do the same thing," he told his students. The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes. But eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the dead cow and sucking on it. When everyone finished, the Professor looked at them and said, "The second most important quality is observation. I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger. Now learn to pay attention. Life's tough, but it's even tougher if you're stupid. ;D ;D
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Post by uncltim on Jun 14, 2008 9:48:32 GMT -7
One Day, at a bus stop there was a girl who was wearing a skintight miniskirt.
When the bus arrived, and it was her turn to get on, she realized that her skirt was so tight that she couldn't get her foot high enough to reach the step.
Thinking it would give her enough slack to raise her leg, she reaches back and unzipps her skirt a little.
She still could not reach the step. Embarrassed, she reaches back once again to unzip it a little more. Still, she couldn't reach the step.
So, with her skirt zipper halfway down, she reaches back and unzips her skirt all the way.
Thinking that she could get on the step now, she lifts up her leg only to realize that she still couldn't reach the step.
So, seeing how embarrased the girl was, the man standing behind her put his hands around her waist and lifted her up on to the first step of the bus.
The girl turns around furiously and says, “How dare you touch my body that way, I don't even know you!”
Shocked, the man says, “Well, ma'am, after you reached around and unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured that we were friends.”
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Post by kaima on Jun 16, 2008 9:09:01 GMT -7
OK JJ, here is a test for Y O U to take, along with everyone else. I failed. There is a very, very tall coconut tree and there are 4 animals: King Kong, a Gorilla, an Orangutan and a Monkey. They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to get a banana off the tree. Who do you guess will win? Your answer will reflect your personality. So think carefully . . . Try and answer within 30 seconds. GO! Got your answer? Scroll down to see the analysis. * * * If your answer is: Orangutan = you're dull and slightly abnormal Gorilla = you're a moron Monkey = even worse, you're an idiot King Kong = your hopelessly stupid Why?  ? A Coconut tree doesn't have bananas! Obviously you're stressed and overworked. Now take some time off and relax! |
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Post by Atlantis5 on Jun 16, 2008 10:39:12 GMT -7
I guess I am out of this, for I would never stick my finger into an animal butt, dead or alive. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- With the young ladies wearing tight minnie skirts, I am safe, for they would not stand any where near me. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- With the coconut tree: Oh dear, I am hopelessly stupid, I chose {King Kong}  I think I will sit in the shade of one of the many fir trees here and sulk.. Charles |
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