about marriage, divorces and annulments

[Jaga]

First of all... this had nothing to do with my situation since I do not expect a divorce any time soon... but this had to do with some of my friends. ;D

In Poland it was extremely dfficult to get marriage annulment through the Catholic church. People who were re-married, could only get a civil divorce, they could not participate in the eucharist etc.
The only procedure possible was the separation but it did not allow for another marriage.

Here in America it seems that the Catholic church made so called annulment so easy that it replaced a divorce! the parents of my friend got an annulment after 25 years of marriage and having two kids! The annulment states that their marriage.... was invalid since the very begining. In some sense it puts their kids in the position.... that their family was not a real family since their parents were never really married! I think this does not make any sense.

I believe that instead of trying to use the loopholes to state that the marriages were invalid the Catholic Church should allow the divorces rather!

I believe that annulment could be possible only in some special cases, when the marriage lasted a short time and there were no kids involved. Otherwise this is just not right!

Why American Catholic Church allows for this to happen? In Poland to get an annulment is a difficult process, sometimes never possible.

[Jaga]

Here is more about it. Some people see Catholic marriage annulment as the "divorce Catholic style".

www.americancatholic.org/Newsletters/CU/ac1080.asp

There are six million divorced Catholics in the United States. However one views this statistic, it represents a searing experience of personal tragedy for six million persons. Many of these persons are wounded further by feeling cut off from the Church, and should they remarry, they are barred from the solace and strength of the sacraments. The annulment procedure is an attempt to bring justice and compassion to many divorced and separated Catholics whose marriage actually was one in appearance only.

[Pawian]

admin said:

In Poland it was extremely dfficult to get marriage annulment through the Catholic church.

The main reason for annulment is when marriage was not consumated, e.g., due to man`s impotence. Other reasons: being underage, already married, a priest, related.

Here in America it seems that the Catholic church made so called annulment so easy that it replaced a divorce! the parents of my friend got an annulment after 25 years of marriage and having two kids! The annulment states that their marriage.... was invalid since the very begining. In some sense it puts their kids in the position.... that their family was not a real family since their parents were never really married! I think this does not make any sense.

I agree. It is strange.

I believe that instead of trying to use the loopholes to state that the marriages were invalid the Catholic Church should allow the divorces rather!

Yes. It is a mistake to try to force two adult people to live together although they don`t want it.

Why American Catholic Church allows for this to happen? In Poland to get an annulment is a difficult process, sometimes never possible.

They try to keep the shrinking congregation by whatever means possible.

[jeanne]

Jaga,

The wife of former congressman Joe Kennedy (son of Bobby Kennedy), Sheila Rausch Kennedy,
wrote a book on this topic. She and Joe married in the Catholic Church, though she was not Catholic. After they divorced, he attempted to be granted an annullment so that he could remarry in the Church. She fought it all the way, feeling that it would be unfair to her children to say the marriage never existed. She believed that it was a valid marriage. She appealed it all the way to the Vatican. It was kept hush-hush after that, but I believe ( I could be wrong - does anyone out there know for sure?) he did not get the annullment. (He ended up remarrying anyway). The title of the book is "Shattered Faith", and it raises some very valid questions about American annullments and the Church.

Jeanne

[Jaga]

Jeanne,

good point. I think I have heard something about the Joe Kennedy problems. In the past in Poland if somebody wanted to have a religious marriage after a divorce - the only way was to change the denomination. This happened to marshal Pilsudski.

[Jaga]

Jerzy,

yes, I agree, they try to keep the congregation. Another point, Roman Catholic Church in America is becoming more like protestant churches which surround it.