Post by rdywenur on Apr 10, 2008 17:11:05 GMT -7
UNANSWERED QUESTIONS
1. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those
little bottles of Evian water?
Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
2. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a
peeing section in a swimming pool?
(My sentiments exactly)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
3. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that
one enjoys it?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
4. There are three religious truths:
a. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
b. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the
Christian faith.
c. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at
Hooters.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
5. If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people
from Holland called Holes?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
7. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~! *~*~*~*
8. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale
bread to begin with?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*
9. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a
person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
10. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*
11. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then doesn't
it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted,
cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry
cleaners depressed?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
12. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
13. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
14. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
15. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole
lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me...they're cramming
for their final exam.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
16. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little
spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use.
Toothpicks?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
17. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office?
What are we supposed to do, write t o them? Why don't they just put
their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for
them whil e they deliver the mail?
*~*~ *~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*
18 If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly
are the others here for?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
19. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
20. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't
zigzag?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*
21 If a cow laughed really hard, would milk come out of her nose?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
22. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?
24. As income tax time approaches, did you ever notice: When you put
the two words 'The' and 'IRS' together, it spells
'THEIRS'?
1. Ever wonder about those people who spend $2.00 apiece on those
little bottles of Evian water?
Try spelling Evian backwards: NAIVE
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
2. Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a
peeing section in a swimming pool?
(My sentiments exactly)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
3. If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea...does that mean that
one enjoys it?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
4. There are three religious truths:
a. Jews do not recognize Jesus as the Messiah.
b. Protestants do not recognize the Pope as the leader of the
Christian faith.
c. Baptists do not recognize each other in the liquor store or at
Hooters.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*
5. If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people
from Holland called Holes?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
7. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~! *~*~*~*
8. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? Aren't they just stale
bread to begin with?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ *~*~*
9. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a
person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
10. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety-one?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*
11. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then doesn't
it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted,
cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry
cleaners depressed?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
12. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
13. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
14. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
15. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole
lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me...they're cramming
for their final exam.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
16. I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little
spoons and forks, so I wondered what do Chinese mothers use.
Toothpicks?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
17. Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office?
What are we supposed to do, write t o them? Why don't they just put
their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen can look for
them whil e they deliver the mail?
*~*~ *~*~*~*~ *~*~*~*
18 If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly
are the others here for?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
19. You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
20. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't
zigzag?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*
21 If a cow laughed really hard, would milk come out of her nose?
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
22. Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?
24. As income tax time approaches, did you ever notice: When you put
the two words 'The' and 'IRS' together, it spells
'THEIRS'?
