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Post by Jaga on Mar 27, 2006 20:08:14 GMT -7
Guys, how is your social life? We live here in Idaho far from the family, we have some friends but... I think sometimes that my social life is mainly... the internet life + work + shopping + other things. Recently we got new neighbors and it seems that everybody is busy with life etc Or maybe the model of life is changing. In the past it was easier to meet people, like in Poland on the streets, not anymore, everybody drives and people live in their fortrecesses
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Yanc
Full Pole
Posts: 337
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Post by Yanc on Mar 27, 2006 23:41:49 GMT -7
I voted for friends and family mixed, in my hometown area. I have not many friends, but these I have, are the real friends. My family is large, believe it or not, almost 20 cousins, second cousins are almost unaccountable . It's true we don't walk as much as before, we drive instead, and therefore we don't meet people on the street. Most people are just happy to get home after work, stay with the family, watch tv and survive till evening, when you finally can go to sleep. Comparing my life to life of my parents in 80's, we now have much smaller social life, seems to me people are generally overworked and live in constant stress, worrying about what future will bring, questions like "will I have job tomorrow" are flashing in mind almost everyday, so people work hard to prove they are useful, and try not to get fired. With unemployment rate of almost 20% competition on job market is very tought. Working hard and in overtime leaves not much time and energy for social life, wages are low, and average Pole has many problems to solve in everyday life. i am sorry that my post is somehow chaotic, but writing about it makes me nervous. I don't have problems with my job, but I am worried about my parents. Thay are both in their 50s, my mom is able to go for retirement next year, providing she will still have a job. Some employers are mean, they will fire people just before retirement to save some costs. And as you may imagine nobody will hire a employee just before retirement. There are however some bright sides of current situations - there is a manpower shortage in some occupations, due to work migration, wages are getting higher, overall situation on job market is slowly improving. Let's just hope then our twin midget government will not spoil everything. Yanc
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Post by leslie on Mar 28, 2006 3:08:55 GMT -7
I voted for the friends and family, although only one of my family lives in the same town as me - my youngest son (age 21) who in fact lives with me. My eldest son and my daughter live, one in the south of England and the other in Wales - so we are spread around. My parents both died quite a few years ago and my older sister is also dead. This leaves a niece who lives in the south of England, a cousin aged 70 who lives in the north-west of England and another cousin aged 90 who lives in the north of England. I am fortunate that I have some good friends nearby - they were wonderfully supportive when I was going through the divorce - and I seem to make friends easily wherever I go, particularly with the age group 21 to 35 or so - the affinity I have with them must be fostered with my son living with me. I also have quite a few friends living in Poland - but that's a thousand miles away; thank goodness for the Internet and emails.
So, all in all, in spite of (or because of) not having a permanent partner living with me, I have a social life that is most satisfying to me. Leslie
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nancy
European
Posts: 2,144
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Post by nancy on Mar 28, 2006 8:35:33 GMT -7
I voted "something else" None of my family lives anywhere near me - most are 1-2 hours away or more (Alaska, Arizona) and my parents died many years ago. From the 1970s through today, I have gone from introverted and isolated --- to working too hard with no time for relaxation --- to working too hard owning a local business but with local friends --- to working from home but active on the Internet. I have never been one who liked to just sit around and talk - every minute has to have a purpose - no spectator sports for me!! But now I think I am in a new phase - I have been very active with some volunteer groups both in town and statewide, and I have met a lot of people over the Internet who share one of my passions (textile art). So the people I volunteer with have become my friends, and I have had "reunions" with some of the textile people when we meet at regional or local shows. It is like we are sisters separated at birth! Plus one of these women is both a friend and a mentor, it is she who kicked me out of my studio and into participating in the art world a bit more (still a long way to go). And then, of course, there are all you guys and Frank! PS. Yanc's email was one I could have written in the 1980s here - it sounds to me as though Poland is following in some of our footsteps. Except for being able to retire in your 50s.
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Post by bescheid on Mar 28, 2006 9:09:56 GMT -7
My vote was: Some thing else.
Not to be different, but, more to actual life experience as it is with the here and now.
My family is small and separated by distance. My daughter lives in Texas, my son lives in the city of Olympia 35 miles (56Km) from Edmonds. My mother of 82 years, lives in an assisted living home in the sister city of Lacy (sister city of Olympia). I visit them monthly. My daughter once every two to three years on her trips to the Washington area.
My dear wife, Anne, has half of her family of brothers and sisters (13) living close by in neighbouring cities. She visits frequently with them at their homes or at a close by casino.
I am not a hermit, but, extrovert. By habits of life, I am a very solitary person. I do not see people, or visit with people. My social life is very very limited to mainly the Internet exchange.
By habit, I am very very attentive to details of my surroundings. On my two hour daily walk through an semi-exclusive neighbourhood along a large lake front. I know many of the resident people and their dogs. Our conversations are always non-committal and exchanges light. I am afraid of big dogs, but, a magnate to them. They always bark their silly heads off on my walk by, and those that are loose, run up to rub on my legs to be petted, they all have big white teeth!
I very seldom answer the telephone, as extremely often the call is not for me, but, for Anne from her girl friend or that of her family, or and mainly, chronic and persistent telephone sales people. If the call is important, they may leave a message.
I have a chronic cough now, so I stay out of public areas and limit my stay in a shopping area.
In short, I am so tired of meetings, giving presentations, dealing with the sensitivities of others, dealing with the political surroundings and technical attention to work issues.
My life is not dreary, it has the rewards of observation. Nature gives up her secrets to those attentive to details. A close examination of a leaf, reveals the small veins under the leave, and occasionally, a small insect. A dying beetle on the street surface, is living out the life that nature has given it, and is on its back trying to regain its feet once more, but, will never accomplish that, for it is dying. These are some of which is my social life. Not very exciting to others I realize and understand.
Solitude is not an end to a means, or means to an end, it is what it is: Just solitude. I am happy for many things. I am alive. I have plenty to eat. I can pay my bills with my retirement cheque and have a roof over my head.
Charles
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nancy
European
Posts: 2,144
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Post by nancy on Mar 28, 2006 12:45:40 GMT -7
Charles, Here is one of my favorite quotes:
"I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity." ~ Albert Einstein
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Post by suzanne on Mar 28, 2006 13:25:32 GMT -7
Interesting discussion topic! Our social life is nonexistent in some ways and rich in others. I live with my husband and our 2 young kids, and mainly due to the age of our kids, it can be a hassle getting out, and babysitters get expensive, so we don't get out a lot, aside from a few daytrips and get-togethers with a couple of local friends. And it's hard to have time to join organizations, clubs, etc. and meet new people and start up friendships. So we are a pretty close foursome. I'd like to get out more and expand my circle of friends somewhat, when my kids are a bit older. Neither I nor my husband is a native New Englander, and our nearest family is my mother-in-law 200 miles away in New York. We do see our families fairly frequently, despite the distance, and we are close to our family members. Thank goodness for email and long-distance telephone service! We each have one close friend and a couple of other friends and a few acquaintances. And I have quite a few Internet friends/acquaintances. But I do like my solitude. I enjoy being with and talking to specific people whose company I truly enjoy, but I can also enjoy being alone and can keep myself company. Must be the result of me being an only child! No matter what, I'm never bored, that's for sure.
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Post by Jaga on Mar 28, 2006 16:00:39 GMT -7
Hi guys, thank you all for interesting contributions. I just thought about my social life yesterday and I felt a bit lonely, we are so far from the family. I was wondering how a rest of you is doing. Usually I do not have any time to feel pity for myself. But now, when I think about my family in Poland, especially these who did not live in the apartments but in the houses - they were not visited by lots of people also. My daughter is much more social than I was or my husband was - I guess, being the only child make you much more active to look for friends at least sometimes
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Post by hollister on Mar 28, 2006 16:18:35 GMT -7
I have been thinking about this all day. I had to vote "something else" but I have to admit I am not sure what that something else may be. Since moving here - I am often lonely. Family is 3,000 miles away and it seems that my friends from up in Idaho have largely forgotten me! I hardly hear from them any more - I think it is an out of sight out of mind thing. Here I have friends of Wayne's but people rotate out in and out every 120 days - so you are always saying goodbye. There are a couple of people here on longer assignments - but they are so busy with work that it is hard to get together.
And of course Seth is in Iraq and that feel very far away.
Since the guys (the Polish contingent) are going to be here long term - their wives and families are coming over for the summer and I am looking forward to that! I have already been told that I am going to be "in charge" of helping them get settled etc...
But in the meantime - I find myself becoming more an more insulated and spending more and more time on-line.
When I first got here I had looked into finding a volunteer position or a job - but with the uncertainty of Wayne's orders at the time - I just couldn't make the commitment required. They had been giving him 3 month orders - We know we will be here (Tampa) through November so for the first time we have a little stability - but we had to move so I was busy with all that that entailed. Now that the dust has settled - I plan on looking on base for some type of volunteer position.
But the capper has to be to find out that I am too old for Leslie!
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Post by bescheid on Mar 28, 2006 18:11:41 GMT -7
{"I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity." ~ Albert Einstein }
Nancy
You are a dear heart for what you say!! Now I understand what wisdom is.
Thank You
Charles
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nancy
European
Posts: 2,144
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Post by nancy on Mar 28, 2006 19:48:07 GMT -7
Hollister-Chris
I have never been clear on what the Polish contingent is doing in Florida - can you explain a bit?
It must be difficult living month-to-month, with orders changing so often. I think cyber-connections do help, you are only as far away as your computer...
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hussar
Junior Pole
Każdy czuje respect przed Husarią
Posts: 78
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Post by hussar on Mar 28, 2006 20:26:25 GMT -7
I am introverted socially. Alot of times my life is just home-school-home or home-school-work-home. Even when I was younger. Part of that comes from the fact that I'm part of the first generation born here so it's not as large a friend/family base to go to. We lived in Colorado during my earlier years 2-7 so it was alot of interaction with neighborhood kids and in school. We then moved back to Connecticut in '96. My parents decided to put us in a private school about 12 miles from home so interaction outside of school was usually pretty limited in elementary and middle school and high school has become even worse. We drive 27 miles one way to school and I don't really identify with alot of the kids except for a few in school, but outside of school we all live in different towns so it's hard to get together. Now that I have my license I have more time to hang out with my best friend who lives 10 miles away and goes to a different school. Through him i've met a group of people I enjoy and can identify with, but it's still hard to interact with people. It can get depressing at times, but sometimes it gives you independence and time to think. I honestly enjoy staying home on a saturday night sometimes, watching a movie, and then just thinking.
In all, I guess sometimes it's self-imposed and it makes me appreciative when there are kids who cannot bear to stay home because they need to hang out all the time or have interaction.
Family-wise, we have no extended family within the U.S. All of our family is back in Poland.
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Post by Jaga on Mar 29, 2006 16:54:14 GMT -7
I have been thinking about this all day. ... Here I have friends of Wayne's but people rotate out in and out every 120 days - so you are always saying goodbye. There are a couple of people here on longer assignments - but they are so busy with work that it is hard to get together. And of course Seth is in Iraq and that feel very far away. But the capper has to be to find out that I am too old for Leslie! Hi Holly, you really took your time to tell us what is going on in your life. I am still a bit confused. You are writing about two men in your life, right? Set and Wayne - so, one is your husband and another is your son? I am not sure. Could you clear up my confusion?
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Post by hollister on Mar 30, 2006 5:43:03 GMT -7
Hi Holly, you really took your time to tell us what is going on in your life. I am still a bit confused. You are writing about two men in your life, right? Set and Wayne - so, one is your husband and another is your son? I am not sure. Could you clear up my confusion? Seth is the son ---- Wayne is the husband ---
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Post by hollister on Mar 30, 2006 5:44:04 GMT -7
I have never been clear on what the Polish contingent is doing in Florida - can you explain a bit? I'll try ;D Currently, the activities in Iraq and Afghanistan are coordinated through a command known as Central Command or CENTCOM which is headquartered on MacDill Air Force Base in Tampa, FL. All of the countries who have pledged support to the US in the Global War on Terrorism (I think that is what we are calling it this month) have Representatives in Tampa to assist in planning etc. Some countries have two people some have many more. Poland currently has three representatives here. As Poland is playing a VERY important role in the coordination of the multi-national forces in Iraq and Afghanistan, they are very visible and considered critical members in the coalition. If you want to read more about the Coalition - try this link www.centcom.mil/sites/uscentcom1/Shared%20Documents/Coalition.aspxDoes that answer your question?
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